I haven't always loved birthdays because I was born without one. Well, not one of my own. I'm not a twin but I was born on my brother's 5th birthday. He didn't want a baby sister. He wanted a fire truck. He was robbed! So was I. Once my mother made me a doll cake, you know with the Barbie doll in the middle and the dress was the cake. That was cool. But it wasn't enough. It was a consolation gift. I was still pissed. I wanted my OWN birthday!
Birthdays started to become more important to me as I realized I could have a birthday and that landing smack on my brother's date didn't mean my birthday was cut in half. A simple mindset shift was all it took, though it took me years to figure that out. Now it's kind of cool to tell people that we are such regular ovulators in my family. Sometimes I relapse and need to remind myself because the old mindset never goes away... it sits there lurking, waiting for a weak moment to attack my confidence.
Maybe that why today wishing YOU a Happy Birthday has become part of my routine. I click that button and I feel better. Why? Honestly, I don't even know many of the people I send wishes to but the idea of letting you know I noticed makes ME feel good. I really want you to have a wonderful day even if I don't know you. I want to give you this acknowledgement of an important milestone in your life. I want to document that WE have made it another trip around the sun. Both of us. Saying Happy Birthday to you has created a "we" moment.
I was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2004. The youngest of my five kids was 7. My husband had moved out years ago and had no idea of my struggles, nor did he provide any help, financial or otherwise, to supporting me and the kids. My birthdays were suddenly gone. And so were the birthdays of my kids because in my mind I wouldn't be there to celebrate and acknowledge them. It was a dark time.
That's when I realized I needed another mindset shift. No matter what the doctors were saying, no matter what the chemo and surgery did to my body and mind, no matter what the financial and physical burden I carried, I needed to live. I had kids! It was hard because there were powerful physical reminders to challenge my decision to BELIEVE against what seemed so obvious, that I was going to die.
So here I am, 14 years after my cancer diagnosis, getting ready to celebrate another birthday. This is a big one because I'm turning 66 and you all know what that means! In the meantime I have learned how to ice skate, play hockey, be a hockey coach, teach hockey and play like a kid; I've learn how to be a health coach and transformative coach and I am saving lives by thinking differently as a nurse, PREVENTING disease instead of just managing it; I save lives! I have learned to keep growing myself, keep learning, keep living and BELIEVE in the miracle of the body and miracle of POSSIBILITY. I have grandchildren and so much love in my life that I had no idea was possible.
MIRACLES happen every day and I want your birthday to be that special. When I wish you a Happy Birthday I am wishing you MIRACLES, POSSIBILITY and at least one simple MINDSET SHIFT that will change your life for the best.
No matter what day your birthday lands on (but hopefully not on mine) Happy Birthday!
Love, Coach Joyce